Saturday, August 30, 2008

Greyhounds or Hell Hounds

If anyone is interested in adopting a greyhound be prepared to go through a lot of unexpected shit including a good old fashioned screwing doggy style. I love animals but these greyhound interrogators (which is what I call them) put you through a bunch of doogy doo just to get to the point of them letting you test the dog out in your house . This still does not guarantee that you will get the dog but it is a good chance that you will continue getting screwed doggy-style by some rather fanatical inquisitors.
First you have to go visit the dog you like at a foster home. Once you fall in love with "that" dog, they then go through your records at your vets of owned animals to make sure they are vaccinated up to date. They also ask for references like family and neighbors. They then bend them over too, questioning them as if they were the FBI. I am truly shocked they did not ask if we had criminal records.
Then the blessed home visit to make sure your house is terrorist proof. This is the step we just completed today and we passed, I think. Although my confidence is slightly shaken as I am married to the #1 computer terrorist of all time malicious intent. (Help me. Someone save me. The esposa won't let me leave the damn house.) You learn fun words while working with immigrants from Peru and Mexico. I have the feeling any dog we get will have an American Latin name for whatever means "doggy style or screwed over." I 'll ask the guys at work. They are always saying something about me and laughing.
So anyhow I must go grocery shopping with esposa to help her with the ninos. Wish me luck because God knows I will need it. Until next time, hasta la vista baby!


Malach the Merciless said...

Glad you are feeling well enough to post.